Authenticity

I've been thinking a lot lately about being the person I'm meant to be. I feel very comfortable w/ myself...but that's been a long process. I wasn't a confident kid. My teen years were hell. I was so insecure. I met Thornton in my 20's, but it was still a time of figuring myself out. I honestly didn't know who I was or what I was meant to be. Now I'm 38 and while I certainly don't have it all figured out, I feel like I'm getting closer to knowing what's right for me. When I worked full time in the corporate world raising money, I was good at what I did, but I never felt all that comfortable doing it. I didn't like having to spend my time pretending to care about the lives of the wealthy in town just to garner donations. I felt like, although I enjoyed my job, I was just biding my time. When I lost my job in October, it opened the door for me to continue on the journey to figuring out what I am meant to do. Being home full time has been an adjustment. Financially, it can be challenging. But, I feel like it's right. I love being able to tell people that if they ever need anything during the day, I'm available. I think maybe that's why getting older doesn't bug me....each year has been such a time of growth that I can't wait to see what will unravel next.

Back to school!!

Yea! The kids went back to school today after having last week and yesterday off for Spring Break. I'll admit, I've got to get this all figured out before summer, because I really didn't get nearly what I needed to get accomplished when they were around all day. They have to understand I need to work w/out tons of interruptions and I need to realize that I have to buckle down!

We cleaned out the pool on Sunday evening. We didn't get it closed up real well at the end of the season, so it had tons of leaves and gunk in it. Thornton and Patrick got it all shop vac'ed out and then the girls helped scrub it all clean. It's filling up right now. Granted, it'll be COLD water for a while, but it's nice to have that task done w/.

Patrick had a track meet yesterday. He did well in his individual races, but he was really disappointed w/ the results of his relay. They had to race against 8th grade teams (they are 3 7th graders and a 6th grader), and Patrick runs the 2nd leg. After those first 2 legs, they weren't too far behind the 8th graders, but the 6th grader running the 3rd leg really had a bad race and they ended up coming in last. Patrick was not happy. I tried explaining to him that as long as he does his best, that's all he can do.

Rubber band war

First of all, we had a very nice Easter. The services at church were amazing. Thornton did an incredible job with the music. After services, we went to my in-law's house for lunch. It was also my MIL's birthday, so that was extra special.

Right now, Thornton and the kids are in the middle of a rubber band war. They are shooting rubber bands at each other and having a grand ol' time. Personally, I can't think of much I'd dislike more than participating. It hate getting shot w/ rubber bands! The kids have even built a fort to duck behind. So nice that Thornton is the perpetual child. Maybe.

Good Friday

I have always thought that Good Friday was such a misnomer. I mean...I know the end result is good, but let's face it...it seems strange to call the day Christ died on the cross "good". Sometimes the weight of the realization of what Christ did for me is too just so overwhelming.

Thornton and I just got back from picking up 61 Easter Lily plants to decorate the sanctuary at church. Can you say allergy attack?? Those plants are so fragrant, it's sickening. And, the yellow stuff from the middle of the plant (the stamen??...Joe, is that right?) gets all over your clothes. But, at least the sanctuary will look beautiful Sunday morning. And smell.

While Thornton and I got the flowers, we left the kids at home to clean Alison's room. Thornton said that there was no way the kids could all work together to accomplish that task w/out fighting. I said that if we expect little, we get little, but if we expect they can do it, they just might. Well....of course, I was wrong. Patrick called and said he threw up and had a very upset stomach. He actually does, but it still would've been nice if he could've sucked it up and cleaned, if for no other reason that to prove my point. Then Rachel called and said that she didn't want to clean anymore, because Alison was watching TV and Patrick was lying down, and she was doing everything. So, now, Alison wants to go outside and play (in the rain), but she has to finish cleaning her room first. It's never easy.

Another beautiful day!

I just can't believe our luck that the week the kids are off for Spring Break, the weather is beautiful! Usually the week is cold and rainy. Today it's supposed to be 85! Alison has already informed me that she will be spraying herself w/ a hose today.

Patrick is going to his girlfriend's house to watch movies this afternoon. I've checked and the mom will be there the whole time, along w/ other kids. Gotta check up on these kids, you know!

They have now dug the basement and poured the walls for my in-law's new house. Their house is going to be only 2 blocks from ours!! I'm so excited and can't wait for the house to be done. Having them so close will be awesome.

It's a beautiful day!

Yea! A sunny, warm day today!! That means children playing outside. I'll admit that it's been a difficult transition this week to having the kids home (spring break) while I'm trying to work. This is the first time I've been home when they are. Previously, I was slaving away in the corporate world...ick! Granted, money is tighter, but it's SO worth it. But, still....it's been hard for them to understand that I have to work during the day. We'll get it all worked out, I'm sure....before summer hits!

Speaking of summer, I've got to find some good day camps for Alison to go to. Patrick has his baseball stuff, plus a week long sleep-away camp. Rach has the same sleep away camp, plus a 2 week performing arts day camp. I don't have anything lined up for Alison yet. Maybe ecology camp. Patrick went to that once. It's right up Alison's alley, too.

A bit suspicious

Yesterday morning Alison was bugging me to take a bath. She loves to take baths....mostly for playtime. Actually, completely for play time. Normally, I don't mind, but we were in a hurry to get to an appointment, so we didn't have time. When we got home, she was already dressed for the day and I had to get working, so I told her she could take a bath at the end of the day. She continued to bug me to take a bath and I continued to deny her. Finally, she gave up and went to her friend Miriam's house. About a half hour later, she comes home drenched and muddy and says, "OK...I fell in the creek...NOW can I take a bath?" She won.

Ozzie came through his little surgery w/ flying colors. Although, apparently, anethesia doesn't bring out the best in him. The vet techs were sarcastically calling him "Mr. Congeniality". I felt bad, like they were criticizing my baby. He's really sweet, just maybe not when he's in pain! When we got him home it was like his hind legs were paralyzed. This led to him falling off the bed and landing flat on his back...twice. He's almost completely back to normal this morning.

Poor Ozzie

Ozzie, our cat, is being neutered today (or spade?...I can't ever remember which is for boys and which is for girls). He had to be at the vet in Springfield (20 minutes away) at 7 a.m. Normally, that wouldn't have been such a big deal, but today is the first day of Spring Break, and I could've potentially slept in. Ozzie did great on the car ride to the vet, but when I tried to get him in his cardboard carrying box (we haven't bought a real carrier yet), he flipped out. I could not get the handles closed. So, I'd pull him back onto my lap and he'd start purring....I'd try to put him back in the box, he'd flip out. And so on. Then I realized that nobody else was in the parking lot, so I probably could just carry him in.

I was talking to the vet assistant about Ozzie's embarrassing problem w/ gas and very loose, extremely stinky bowel movements. She said that they probably needed to de-worm him again. I said, "he never has been de-wormed". So, hopefully that is the problem, considering he had been living on the streets before we got him.

We get to pick him up around 3.

Nap time?

I really needed a nap this afternoon. I did get one....kind of. During my nap, Rachel called to see if she could have dinner at the friend's house she was at. Then Patrick came in and asked if he could go to a friend's house. Then Alison came in and asked if she could play at the back yard neighbors house. Then Alison came in again to ask if she could go to the house a few doors down to play with the boys that live there. Then Alison came in to ask if she could go to another friend's house. Then I gave up.

Who needs TV?

We got our cat this toy. It has a mouse that squeeks on a bungee cord. I can't even tell you how much fun we have had watching Ozzie play w/ this toy! We have it hanging on the French door between the dining room and the sun room. The cat will sit on the back of the love seat and then pounce on the mouse. Seriously, I'm going to have to stock up on these toys....they're brilliant!

Prayers for a friend

Please keep the daughter of a friend of ours in your prayers. Sarah is a sophomore in college and was diagnosed today w/ lymphoma. She will be having more tests soon to find our what kind of lymphoma it is, and what the treatment will be. Her family is so scared right now, as is expected.

Ready for slopping in the creek!

Alison loves to play in one of the creeks by our house (we live in a subdivision that has a series of ponds and creeks conntecting them). I have told her that I don't mind her getting dirty because I'd rather she was having safe fun outside than sitting inside watching TV. So, today I found the perfect boots for her to wear in the creek. Won't these be great?

Now I can't wait for her to get home from school...LOL!

New logo?

What do you think of this new logo? I can change the color...any thoughts??

She made it!!

We didn't get a letter today regarding Rachel's audition for the Ballet Company, so I kind of wondered if that wasn't bad news...but...I just checked the website and SHE MADE IT! I'm so proud of my little ballerina!

Take me out....

Ahhh...baseball season has started up once again! My favorite time of year. Good thing it lasts 6 months, eh? The St. Louis Cardinals played their first game yesterday (and won!) and all seems right with the world again. Patrick's first game w/ his travelling team is April 22. His season won't be done until the end of July, then school ball starts up 2 weeks later. Yeah...it's a good thing I like baseball, because I see a lot of it!!

Rachel should find out today if she made the trainee program for the ballet company. My gut reaction is that she had to have made it, but I don't want to get my (or her) hopes up.

Vacation

My best laid plans of blogging while on vacation were quickly thrown out the window. Sure, I *could've* blogged, but the reality was I didn't want to!

We had a great vacation! We went to Bradenton, FL, which is south of the Tampa/St. Pete area, on the Gulf. My in-laws rent a house down there for 6 weeks. The first part of the vacation, the weather was chilly in the low 60's. The pool at the house was supposed to be heated, but it didn't seem to be. The kids didn't seem to mind the cold water, though. I got in a couple of times when it was cold and it took a LONG time to get used to it. Our last 4 days there, the weather was in the 80's and beautiful. We went to the beach at Anna Maria Island twice and had a great time. It was perfect...not a ton of people, amazing sand and perfect weather. We even saw dolphins swimming out where we had been swimming just moments earlier.

I'll post vacation pictures later. I got some great ones!!

Now, it's back to reality. The kids are back in school this week, then have next week for Spring Break. We couldn't go on vacation then because Thornton has to be here for church, since it's Easter season.

Rachel auditioned for the trainee program w/ the Springfield Ballet Company. We'll find out tomorrow, I think, if she's made it. There are only 25 spots, so I hope she did. This is the first year she's been old enough to audition, so we'll just have to see.

SNOW!

School is cancelled today because we got about 6 inches of snow. It's still falling now, too. And blowing. Our huskey is in snow dog heaven!! She loves the snow!

Alison left last night for Florida w/ Thornton's brother and his family. They asked if Alison wanted to go down a few days early and she jumped at the chance. I miss her already! She would have loved this snow and would've been outside playing in it all day. Ah well...sunny Florida will be nice too, I'm sure! :-)

I guess Rachel didn't get a part in The King and I. They were supposed to call last night, but we didn't get a call. She's really cool about it. She knows she did awesome!

Sit Still!!

I took Rachel and Alison to see Springfield Ballet Company's "Cinderella". It was a great performance. But...Alison can not sit still to save her life. It is so frustrating to see all these little girls who are so well behaved, while I sit there saying, "sit still...stop kicking the seat...keep your legs still" the whole dang time. And after every show I take her to I tell her that I won't be taking her to any more shows, and yet I always do. I really want her to be exposed to the arts, but it's killing me...it really is!

At the call backs yesterday, they sang again, did a little scene w/ the King and then cut the group again down to 20 kids. Rachel made that cut! Then they lined the kids up by height and just stared at them for close to 20 minutes. It was so unnerving to have these directors just staring down these kids and then talking and whispering amongst themselves. Thornton said that at least Rach made it that far on talent. Beyond that, they are just looking for whatever "look" they want...and there's nothing you can do about that. She should hear tomorrow night if she got a part.

Callback

Rachel auditioned this morning for our local Summer outdoor theater. She did great! She got a callback for The King and I, so we go back at 2:30 for that. Thankfully she was in the first group of 50 kids to audition, because when we left at 10:30 (after getting there at 7:45), they were up to 288 kids who were wanting to audition!

Green

Well, it's St. Patrick's Day and I don't own anything green. Actually, I have a limish green shirt, but it's in the wash and I didn't feel like doing the load just so I could wear it. Alison, however, was absolutely not going to school today unless she had green on. So, she's wearing a green t-shirt with a green sweatshirt over it and jeans w/ green stitching. Patrick, had his St. Patrick's Day shirt on from Old Navy. I really want to make a shirt for him some year that says "St. Me Day", because that's what he used to call it when he was little. Rachel didn't care about wearing green, so I'm sure she'll get pinched.

Rachel is auditioning for our local summer outdoor theater (The Muni) tomorrow. Last year she got call backs for 2 shows, but didn't end up getting one of the few parts for children. This year they are doing 2 shows that have lots of girls in them (Annie Warbucks, the sequal to Annie, and The King and I), so I hope she has a shot of getting cast. She's got an awesome singing voice and can dance, so that seems promising. Keep her in your thoughts!